Death of a Dating Profile

Hi, have you ever heard of GOOGLE FUCKING MAPS??!!?

Last time I checked, human females have two breasts. And despite loving how awesome my TWO breasts are, I can't see myself giving in and...

Yep. I am cooler than your feeble mind can perceive, fella.

No, no we shopsn't.

All my life I have said that if I can just get my hands on a guy who uses "u" instead of "you" AND self-proclaims to h...

But, do you have bloodwork? Because I really don't want an NSA STD. And, do you have references? Because obviously I am a magnet for ...

  I received several messages from a guy I have nothing in common with which said nothing more than the generic "hey baby how you do...